Show opens with the audience in line to see the show, telling each other how their tickets were forced on them. In his opening monologue, Jack analyzes his own humor. Dennis sings 'Around the world in 80 days.' Don does the Lucky Strike commercial as a calypso number; Jack won't let him finish it. He introduces Mel Blanc as Otto Ketzler, a novelty music act from Vienna; Ketzler plays bottles filled with alcohol--as he tunes them, he becomes more and more inebriated. Don's wife makes Jack call the sponsor to explain that the curtailed commercial was Jack's fault, not Don's.

During the monologue, the President and Secretary of the Jack Benny Fan Club, Pasadena Chapter, come onstage. Don and Harlow Wilson do a soft shoe to 'Me and my shadow' for the Lucky commercial. Hal March, host of The $64,000 Question quiz show, is the guest; Jack asks him questions, and he tries to answer them for prizes.

Jack wants to star in the movie version of his life story, but producer Buddy Adler wants Van Johnson. Van Johnson and Buddy Adler play themselves. Announcer: Don Wilson. Rochester: Eddie Anderson.

Dennis sings 'The 12th of never.' In the sketch, Jack plays Ralph Kramden in a take-off of The Honeymooners, with Meadows as Alice and Dennis as Ed Norton.